• My Business Muse

A time and place for rebuttal

I had a gentleman message me on LinkedIn. He stated he is an engineer and was interested in what he saw in my LinkedIn profile. I responded to his message saying that I had closed the shop and was in the same position of being an older only I called it experienced worker. In his response to my response, his first sentence was, "don't you mean older worker." He then followed that up with he wanted to know if he could visit the shop. Let me tell you a dirty little secret. The minute you correct someone during a conversation or correspondence on a matter in which it was plain what the subject was and what the writer or speaker intended to express, you have ended any constructive dialogue. The corrected person will, from that point on, will only continue the exchange to be polite.

I have been in many conversations where the person speaking to me may not have stated the facts quite correctly, but I did not needlessly correct them because I knew what they meant. In certain situations, yes, you want to clarify everything before you proceed. In everyday life, you must turn that off, or you will find yourself only having conversations with like-minded people.

So my silent response to the gentleman is no, I do not want you to visit the shop as you have already shown you do not know the art of conversation.

Genuine conversation is listening to learn, not looking for a rebuttal. There is a time and place for rebuttal, and it is not a general conversation.


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My reflections gathered through reading, listening, personal work experience and observation 

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said.

Peter Drucker


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